The HighClass Dirtbags Podcast
The HighClass Dirtbags Podcast
EP:67 "SLAPPY HAPPY" (THE LIGHT SIDE OF THE PALM) Feat: Black Magic
Song Of the Week:
LONELY by 3RD WXRLD
This Week On:
"NO FOR ME DAWG."
Can you date someone that can talk to ghost?
Would you take male birth control?
Best man confess love to his best friends girl at their wedding what’s your reaction?
Should a man let his girl accept gifts from another man if he can’t afford it?
You can live longer if you upload ya Brain to the cloud.. you doing it?
Can you date someone with short term memory loss?
Have you learned enough from TV movie to survive in the woods? Like build a fire?
This Week On:
"NPOren."
Jewish super hero moonknight
Yale student steals 40 million in electronics
White band SOJA soldiers of Jan army win Grammy over black reggae artists
Elon be tweeting owns 9 percent of twitter now
Black surpreme court judge Kentanji Brown
64,000 question is now 680,000 due to inflation
Paralyzed man using brain implant orders a beer
House votes to legalize weed waiting on Senate
Guess That Crime, Dumb Laws According To Dumber States and much more!
Record. Record. Huh? Huh? You gonna record for me? Ah, record. Aha! Marker number motherfucking two, bitches. Alright. Do-do-do-do-do. You are now listening to the Smooth Sounds of Dirtbag Radio. Keep the change. Okay, you dirtbags! Got you, bitch! Had to make a couple, had to make a couple Had to make a couple, had to make a couple Had to make a couple, had to make a couple, nigga Had to make a couple Who them boys say ride on side cause we don't know them niggas We gon' fuck around and send them shots as fully unload them pistols You can't react off emotion cause that what they want Hey, guess what? Guess what? We back. Let's go. We're back, motherfucker. Hey! As always, this is the High Class Nerds Podcast, and it's your boy Olanski. Three I's on Instagram, two I's in person, one I on motherfucking paper, a.k.a. Dijon Pijon, a.k.a. LL Coochie, a.k.a. Senor Ben Truitt. You dig? Damn, you got a new one. Ben Truitt. My boy Ben Truitt. My boy Ben Truitt. Hey! Sounds like Truist Bank. Yeah. You already know who it is, man. Flamespeed back again in this motherfucker. Flamespeed36 on Instagram. You funky doghead bitch. You. AKA Mr. That's a no from me, dawg. And it's me, the man with no intro who apparently just became an intro. Owen. Jew Lucky Instagram. Simple. That's an intro now. That's an intro. No intro is an intro. Yeah, no intro. We got some special guests in this motherfucker today. Let's go. Who want to go first? Fuck it. This is just your boy, Black Magic. Back again. BLAKMAG88 on Instagram, even though I ain't on it. But y'all got it. He was my boy, Black Magic. Motherfucker, Black Magic. That motherfucker was on season one of the High Class Dirtbags podcast, man. So I'm glad he came back for season three. You dig? Who else we got? Van Kelty of Gaudi Designs. Word. That's my dog right there. You got to get on the mic real quick. Hold on. Get him right. Get him right. Get them right, man. Get them right. Gotti Designs. Get them right. Let them know what's up. Oh, hold on. Please excuse these technical difficulties. We'll be right with you in just a second. Be the dirtbags. Should be good. Should be good, yeah. All right, yeah. You just got to... All right, Beck. All right, so... Oh, once again, this is a high-class dirtbags podcast. I had to do this stuff formally. Yeah, yeah. Welcome. So you got to say your name. on the podcast. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. High class dirt bags. Happy to be here. Word, word, word. It's Vin Kelsey of Garty Designs Custom with the epoxy flooring countertop artists and builders. Hey, man, he did my kitchen. Ah. Wow. Somebody y'all want to get in touch with. I'm telling you, man. I got some marble swirls in my junk, man. I'm telling you, man. I'm telling you, man. Shout out to my dog, man. You got to go follow him. Appreciate you coming through today and joining us, man. So it's time to get to the nitty gritty. I mean, actually, how's everybody How you doing, man? Everybody doing all right?
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Hanging in there. Doing great, Tim. Bless. Yeah, yeah, cold. Yeah, getting cold, hot, hot, cold. Hey, man, I love the South, man. It's going outside. I love the South. Yeah, you got to wear a basketball. No, fuck that. It's some bullshit. It's like 45 degrees outside in April. Yeah. I know all of you listening are like, Michigan, I'm like, what's wrong? But it is the first week of April. It be like that every year, though. I had a bet. I had a bet. Matter of fact, I just texted my dude. He texted me like, nah, you lost. I was like, nah, I told you it was going to be 40-something in a day. It was 12pm, I was 42. Let me get my money.
UNKNOWN:What?
SPEAKER_01:Nah, we had a bet about it. I was like, yo. He's like, nah, it's going to get warm. It's not going to get cold in them. I said, dog, it always get cold in the beginning of April. Every year. Every fucking year. It get cold in the beginning of April, like the first, second week. And I won that bet. And run me my money, my boy. Right, so dinner on you. Drinks on you. Yes, sir. So where's my cut? I'm just imagining that like you're Vegas now. Betting on the weather, come on. That's like the groundhog. They be betting on the ground. soon as it, soon as it happens. Man, you can bet on anything now, man. Yeah. Real shit, but you always bet on black, you do. Sorry, James, you filthy animal. Gotcha, bitch. Motherfucker. Well, it's good, man. I'm glad everybody's doing well. I've been well too, man. Shit, just can't complain, man. It's so much to unpack and unwind. So where do we start this time? April. April? Well, Every minute. There's something every month. Oh, there's a lot of foolery going on. There's something every month. So I guess we're going to go ahead. You know what? We're going to get the juices flowing today, man. We're going to start off. We pissed a lot of people off with some of the episodes. So we do got to talk about that. So one of the things... You know what? Fuck it. I ain't talking about it. I ain't explaining shit to these people. Fuck it. Y'all like it. If y'all don't like it, still listen, please. Keep us on mute. Keep the notifications on mute, but still subscribe so we get the numbers. All right, man. I guess today, man, we just going to come in hot. Fuck it. So we got a new segment on the show that we've been doing, and it could be considered not politically correct, but fuck it. Who cares? And it's called Guess That Crime. Oh, we're jumping into this? We're jumping into it. We're jumping into it. America's favorite segment. Without further ado. Let's go off early. It's time to guess that crime. Yes, it's time to guess that crime. That crime. We're still working on a new show for this one. This should be the cop song. This should be the cop song. I like this one. I like the saxophone. Yes, it's time to guess the crime. That's a nice little... Very sexy, man. All right. Well, this is kind of a dead giveaway, but fuck it. A father in New Orleans was arrested for killing the man who allegedly killed his son while that dude was on his way to court for his son's case. Sound about right. And I know it's called Guess That Crime. It should be Guess the Race of This Crime. You just said New Orleans, so I'm going to go with... We're guessing the race. Statistically, it's more likely that because of the crime... Hold on. Before we start, Guess That Crime Time means... I'm going to say a crime. I already know the answers because I did the research. Everybody's going to go around and tell me what denomination that person that said crime was. What box of waste do they check on their employment? Black, African-American. Asian, Pacific. All right. Exactly. To get to the details. All right. So without further ado, let's get back into it. All right. Who wants to go first? I'm going to go first. I'm going to say black on this one. I'm saying black because you said New Orleans. Majority of New Orleans is, you know. Statistically, this is the easiest. I'm only going by statistics now.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I see anybody doing this crime. Seriously, I see any race doing this crime. Like, this is not one that's, you killed my son, I'm going to kill you. Black? Yeah. You guessed it. You guessed it.
UNKNOWN:You're right.
SPEAKER_01:You're right. How long did homeboy get? It just happened a couple of weeks ago. Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah. I hope he don't get nothing. Yeah, I mean, certain cases, man, you got to let a man go free, man. They got a lot of time to kill. There was actually a time in this country where that was perfectly legal to do. You can actually stand in front of a judge and be like, why'd you kill him? Well, he killed my son. They'd be like, Bible says, eye for an eye. Have a good day, sir. But that's what they were. That used to be... It's only if he was white. Exactly. W-Y-T. I thought I was a very selective thing, my friend. Let's just be real about that. I don't even want to get into it. We just started this. Oh, no, we don't. We're all in agreement on this. We don't have to move on. We can move on. All right. Man charged with murder after shooting... White. After shooting his girlfriend and then... Stuffing her in the fridge. Of course in the fridge. I saw the word fridge. I was like, why? Man charged with murder after shooting. Wait. Man's charged with murder after shooting a homegirl and then he stuffed her in the fridge. Yep. I'm going with that. Black people don't usually. YT as well. Might be Hispanic. Oh, man. Listen, this isn't a might be. We need to know. I'm going to say YT. Yeah. White? White? Any what? The recipes, by the way. All right. Well, let me see. I don't know, man. I don't. I'm going to
SPEAKER_00:say Julio. Julio.
SPEAKER_01:That's wrong, actually. What? Who was it? Please don't tell me it was us. It was a brother. Damn. You throwing trick questions at me. Look, you should have told us why he did it. Preserve. of the body. Wait, hold up. For real? Yeah, it was a brother. Magic doesn't believe you. I'm not sure. Minnesota or something, but yeah. Yeah, that sounds about right. I need the details. Prince is from Minnesota, though. It's tough, man. What does that have to do with Prince, though? Because Prince is like, if Prince can walk around with assless jeans on, then like, wow. We don't be chopping people up and putting them in no fucking freezer. Well, on their quality. I don't know. Hey, if you walk around chaplain jeans, you capable of chopping somebody. I mean, surely there's got to be. You're capable of doing anything. You eating something. You eating a person. You a cannibal. You eat ass. I mean, at the very least. Are there black serial killers? Hell yeah. There was just dude, something little. There's probably like four in the history of the world. I mean, there's always something off. The most prolific U.S. serial killer, as I know right now, is a black dude named like something little. And he traveled like all over the country killing people. And he admitted to like 200 or 300 something murders. They confirmed like 100 of them. What type of people? Something like that. Like all kind of people. People, people. It doesn't matter. No, because I'm thinking like if it's like a Jack the Ripper thing where he would carve out, you know, prostitutes, you know, vaginas and stuff and put them in like, you know, a saucer. God damn, we ain't never get that Viacom. That's what started off with the wrong section. They talking about this on History Channel. Nah, but. I mean, true. But that dude. All right, we got to move on. Next one.
SPEAKER_00:Next trick question. That really bothers me.
SPEAKER_01:Man kills father because his father told him to get a job and move out. Oh, man. I'm going white off top. Man kills his father. White teeth. I don't know, man. Wait, wait. I don't know. I give up. You gotta pick something. I'm going white as well. All right. I mean, that's some entitled shit right there. Yeah. How dare you make me get a job? Okay, thank God. Bitch, we're guests. No, Dad, I don't want to leave. Stab, stab, stab. Basically. All right. I mean, that's just some dumb shit. Like, now you can move out. And now you're going to jail. I don't want to sound like I'm cotton paste over here, but like... Bless you. Moving out. Jail or move out? Jail or move out? Life. Move out? Jail. Life. But then he goes to jail and he never has to move out ever again in his life. Maybe that's... Ah. Right. Maybe. Maybe his dream has come true.
UNKNOWN:Right.
SPEAKER_01:Never have to work a day in his life. He's going to have to work. I don't know what prison he's in. I don't know if black people can move out. We can put out. Yeah, we won't get asked to move out. We can put out. All right, so y'all... Two out of one? What is it? Two out of three. Two out of three. I like how we're all guessing in a group here. Two out of three, right? All right. Four Florida men caught stealing$100,000 worth of gas with a trap door in a minivan. That sounds like a white dude. Actually, a trap door in a minivan? Yeah, that's what I did. Well, how are you going to sell$100,000 worth of gas? How can you get$100,000 worth of gas? But hear me out, though. How is it going to fit? Like, the car would be too heavy. Hold on. I actually know this story. They spent a few days... It had to be white people. I don't know the race, but it says men. It has to be white people. So I would like to think it was a group of mixed race people. Not like each one individual, but like one black guy. I say the same. UNICEF. I'm going to say white. White. I say the same. Four white men? White. It's in Florida too. Well, unfortunately. No. No. No. No, damn it. Y'all kind of got it right, but but you kind of didn't because it was four Spanish dudes and one dude didn't look kind of white, but you know how Spanish dudes can look white. I really feel like it was four Spanish dudes. What you said, a Spanish dude looks white. They actually are. I remember when I was dating the Colombian, when she came here, we were doing some work and she checked white. I was like, no, babe, you got to check Hispanic. She's like, but I'm in white. I'm Like in Columbia, you're white. But here in America, that's not how it works. Wait, what? Yeah, she thinks, you know, they have different tones of skin in South
SPEAKER_00:America, too. They call
SPEAKER_01:themselves white? Yeah. That's not surprising. Well, uh... But they don't see it. It's not a cultural thing over there as much as it's just like... They don't have those questions on their application. They just go by comparing us to what they see on TV. That makes sense. I'm still trying to figure out... I still have blonde hair and blue eyes, so... as Tom Cruise. He's white, I'm white. I'm still trying to figure out how you steal that much gas. Oh, so they did it in different things. From my understanding, they filled up tanks. I was wondering if he was going to get to the store. They were able to somehow not get charged for doing it. They would hack the machines or some shit. Oh, yeah, with the card machines, which seems to be easier and easier. You can go by with your phone and be like, haha, I got your money. So the story I'm talking about, they had a trap door in a minivan, and they rolled over the little gas thing that the The 18 wheelers? Yeah. They rolled over that motherfucker three or four times a day. You know what I'm saying? And then took all the gas from the gas station. But my thing is like, how did they? Hold on. Isn't that sensor based? And they see that thing go off in there because there's a meter in there that lets you know. I mean, they smart. They probably put like a big ass tank in that minivan too. You know, pressure washing water type thing. That's exactly what they did. Probably see the van just lower on the wheels. A big pressure washing van. And you see them boy come up every couple of minutes or, you know, couple of hours, pull up right over the little thing. They got a little trap door in the
SPEAKER_00:van. Like ice fishing.
SPEAKER_01:The city ice fishing. They're sending it up there. I wonder if it was diesel. Man, it don't matter what it was at that point. It was genius. That's what it was. They said they got a couple hundred thousand if not a couple million from local gas stations. I wonder what they did in the car as they were doing it. One dude's obviously working there, but the two people sitting in the front like, look busy. Smoking a cigarette. Smoking a cigarette. They pull out the paper. Come with that. Put that shit out. Smoking a cigarette. I'm looking busy, bro. You said look normal. They would never think we're stealing gas if I'm smoking. Smoking a cigarette. That's fucked up. Yeah, you light a cigarette. You can't have no electronics in that moment. You look around, have your socks off, and rub on the carpet. You get static shock. Next thing you know, boom. Oh, no. All right, so y'all two out of what? Well, three out of four. Three out of four? Yeah. Keep the score like we have a prize at the end of this. All right. Man attaches Apple Watch to his girlfriend's car, gets caught. Oh, that's definitely what I do. Tracking. Yeah, that's definitely what I do. Why are you going somewhere else? What happened when He got caught, though. I mean, I didn't read that part. No, he got caught. His Apple Watch got caught because it was linked to his iCloud or some shit. Dumbass. Oh, instead of buying that AirTag, I'm just going to stick my watch in there. Like, that is like grade-A stalker shit. Yeah. Like, there should be like a charge for that or something. Yeah, he got charged for it. But what is he? White. Yeah, he's definitely white. Chip is... Oh, we were wrong again. Uh-oh. Don't say it, brother. Don't say it, brother. Easy. It was a brother. No, man. It was a brother. It was a brother. Hey. Hey. And you know why I did that? You know why I'm doing this? To prove to motherfuckers we ain't just picking on certain people. We picking on all people. See, it's like we picking on white people. It's like we're picking on me right now. It does not matter what race you are because everybody commits crime.
SPEAKER_00:And
SPEAKER_01:now you know. I am upset that the Florida men so far, the only one with a cool crime is usually the Florida men. Usually it's like Florida man dumb shit. But it's like Florida man smart. Last crime. Florida man smart. A woman recently revealed that she found out her OBGYN is actually her dad. And the story gets deeper.
SPEAKER_00:Apparently
SPEAKER_01:this doctor was a fertility doctor back in the day. and people needed to get pregnant. And instead of getting sperm from donors, he gave them his sperm. So then not only did she find out her OBGYN was her father, but it was like under false pretenses. And then she, he's got like half, she's got half siblings out there as well. Did he know this was his daughter? Yes. Yes, he knew. I seen this story. Ew, that's nasty though. But like, so, so, so the dude is a gyne doctor. And then he is a doctor. So let's give him that. He's a professional. You know, there is like the creep factor to it. But again, this is a doctor. But you're still looking at your daughter's vagina. Damn, man. Yes, I know. It's like, I wish we had like a whole thing. Ain't nothing though. That's why I was like. And you ain't looking like you in there, bro. Like, for real. That's nasty, bro. You got to go to another doctor. Yeah, that got to be a white dude. It almost seems too obviously white, dude. But 30 years ago. I don't know. It happened 30 years ago? I don't know. Apparently the white shit is not black shit, so I don't know. All right. He did this crime 30 years ago. 30 years ago? That's when the crime started. Damn, he been selling- That dude got like 100 kids, though. He been selling freaking backseat. Oh, my God. So, can I get a guess? Which city? Can we get any questions? No, no, no, no, no. Say what? Florida. I wish we had a name. I have no idea. I'm saying it's a white dude. Fuck. I feel like he's tricking me again. Vanilla ice. I have no idea. I can't think of any race to do this. I mean, white seems like the safe answer. We are in America. Cool, so say it. Okay. White. All right. They got it. Oh, okay. Y'all got it. Y'all got it. I guess y'all 50-50. So, you know what I'm saying? Half of y'all is racist. That's fair. That's fair. Wait. We ain't never getting this Viacom sponsorship, motherfucker. Fuck them. We get that Amazon Prime sponsorship now. We going for that. They don't give a fuck. Yeah. And that was the Guess That Crime segment. I hope you like it. So, Magic, man, you guys feel better about yourself now coming in here? I was going to say, though, it's good to have headlines like that in the news instead of saying black man could make this crime or white man found doing X, Y, Z. You know what I'm saying? But they never say white man. They say man when it's ever a white dude. And they say a black man did. It's always that if you watch it. That's what it always is. I think it should just be. Motherfucker. Nah, yeah, it should be, man. But my whole point, the reason I did that is just to show that like, yo, look, everybody commits crime, man. There are such things that we used to think about back in the day like, oh, race-based crimes and stuff. Certain race-based crimes still do happen. Don't get me wrong. Everybody's fucked up, man. It's a crazy-ass world, man. But even though this world is crazy, we're going to bring some joy to it somehow. You know what I'm saying? That's what the fuck we do here at the High Class Dirtbags podcast. And if anybody's offended by that, I'm sorry. But that's just life, man. We here, we got to bring everything full circle. We're going to see it from our perspective, the other person's perspective, and then we're going to make some new perspectives. You know what I'm saying? I really want to get an OBGYN's perspective on this because I am still at my head around this fucking story. If any of our listeners... Yeah, yeah, please chime in. Please chime in on this. I'm confused. Would you be your daughter's doctor? That's crazy. It's almost like if you were a physician, let's say, it would make, you know what I mean, like just a general medicine doctor. You know, like you're going for checkups. Like, yeah, you obviously would probably want your daughter to make sure she's doing good. So at what level does it get to when And you're like, you know, is it professional to keep that in? Private parts. Or just to send it off? That's what I'm wondering. Private parts. We're not doctors, so we don't know. But private parts. Yes, I'm in agreement with you. But if that's your child. Yeah, exactly. I'm talking about like on a professional level of like amongst doctors, how do they do this? Because even if you're not a doctor, though, you probably still want to check up on your, you know what I mean? But you can also think. This is kind of how like T.I. did it, you know what I mean? Yeah. That was weird. Yeah. This is also weird. But is it weird to us, or is it weird to doctors as well? Like, when I get sick, like, you know, my aunt's a nurse, and when I get sick, I call her and I explain what's going on before I decide whether or not I, you know, need to go to the doctor. But I have no problem. You know, I mean, I'm not going to have them funneling my junk. Like, that's not happening. That's why I cross it. It's the high class. Dad's like, yo, let me see your meat. That's the way I want to go. Like, nah. Nah, bruh. If that was me, I would have punched that motherfucker. Hold on, here's another thing. You've been looking at my meat all these years? What's wrong with you? Here's something else. It even is not as creepy as a father-son thing. The fact that it's a father-daughter kind of makes it even more... My mom, it don't matter. All my dad looking at my meat. I think there's an age in which you, when you're growing up, that you hit an age where you're like, Like, all right, I'm, it's not okay for them to, you feel like it's not okay. Or you hit a point. Like, because as a child, it didn't matter.
SPEAKER_00:You see what I'm
SPEAKER_01:saying? Maybe it's like, I don't know, 13, 14, something like that. You hit an age where you're like, I kind of don't want. I went to my homie house the other day. His two-year-old son, five minutes, as soon as he took his diaper off, running around the house ass naked. I was like, yeah, my son do the same thing. I mean, my nephew does that. He be like, da, da, da, da, da. And I'm like, yo, where's his pants? Yo, bro, put something on, bro. Like, come on, man. You can't walk. Sometimes you got to walk in a room and put them on the table, but not this room. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I think we're all in agreement. It's on to us. Yeah. But is it something that's... Not any room I'm in. Like, shit. If I'm in that room, don't walk in there and put them on the table. Shit. Let me leave first. That bothers me. I also think it's a patient. Like, who would know better for you who would give you the best advice but you're I mean of course of course but like like I said it's like I have no idea for me yeah it's weird it's weird I mean but then you gotta think about families who grew up in the medical community in the medical field yeah in the medical community even though even though I did it's there's still things that I don't do you know what I'm saying and for me I'm just like like I said you're hitting age and you're like nah we have a very close friend whose father is an OGBY Man, you didn't even get the acronyms right. OBGYN. OBGY. OBJAN. OBJAN. OBJAN. OBJAN. OBJAN. You want to hear something funny? I had an appointment with my urologist. And I'm like talking to the director or something like that. And I'm like, I got to go see my, and I said, the gynecologist, whatever by accident. And he was like. I was like, I'm sorry, urologist. We're just talking about gynecologists. It's just something. I was like... He was like... He was going to be like, damn, bro. I'm sorry, sis. I'm sorry, sis. I'm sorry, sis. I'm sorry, man. Excuse me, madam. Every time we see you, how's it going, madam? Hey, man, it was just messed up. I was high as hell. Man, that really bothers me. All right, well... We're going to find out. We're going to ask this person. Yeah, I'm going to find out for sure. Man, our teammate He may not talk about it. You know how he may not talk about it. All right, before we get started with Nice to Know From Me Dog or N.P. Oren, I did want to do one other thing. It's going to be called... So from now on out, from here on out, every episode from here until we get to the last fucking letter of the fucking alphabet, I'm going to be talking... I'm going to list a couple of the dumbest crimes according to each state. And we're going to alphabetical order. Oh, Lord. You know what I'm saying? So we have 50 of these for the... So every episode, I'm going to list a couple. So we start Today, we're starting off with Alabama, man. Oh, I was going to say what we can guess. We got to go to Alabama. I know. I want to guess that A, Alabama. There's no reason to guess, though, because there's something to talk about. All right. It's illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hive. Now, when I saw this, I was like, that seems pretty stupid. But then I was like, wait a minute. This is Alabama. Somebody had to do that once in order for it to be in Alabama. That's what... There is no man creative... You can take a room of writers and nobody will ever come up with that unless they have seen something like that. Yeah. And I wonder what the cause is. Somebody had to tie it up and somebody walked by and it was like... I'm always going even further. No, no, no. I don't think it's that. I think... Because that happens with dogs a lot. No, but I would... My guess... No, no. Hold on, hold on. My guess is that somebody tied an alligator to a fire extinguisher. A fire extinguisher. A fire broke out. That's what you said, fire hydrant. Fire hydrant, sorry. So I said... Fire hydrant. Fire extinguisher. That's two totally different questions on the wall, bro. Fire hydrant. It's just like... I locked him up on the fire extinguisher. You see the holes in the wall. Just take the fire extinguisher. Somebody tied him up to a fire hydrant. Yeah. It could have been her. Yeah. And a fire broke out. Like I said, and it was like. And the fire department was like, what the fuck are we doing? It wasn't just a pedestrian. It actually caused damage. It was sitting there all meek. It was like their eyes all low. And then something went by and it was like. Yeah. Took dude whole leg off. I'm going to say City Hall burned down because somebody had an alligator tied to a fire hydrant. That's one of them. I'm going to do that. Throwing salt can lead to execution. How the fuck? If you throw spilled salt over your left shoulder or else you'll have bad luck. Something bullshit like that. Yeah. Yeah, it's an old superstition. I still do it. It's an old superstition, but you can also be executed. You know why I do it? Because of Dumb and Dumber. In Alabama, because
SPEAKER_00:of it. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Wait, so you can be executed for doing the X or not? For doing it. Throwing salt over your shoulder. You can be executed. Okay, so with this law, I'm going to ask, how the fuck do you think that one came into existence? Somebody slipped. Somebody slipped. They threw some salt, and somebody was like, whoop. No, I'm thinking he threw it and somebody was behind him and it got in their eyes and it was like, oh shit. And then it blinded them. My take, and this is literally just the first thing. This should be illegal. It's a Bible belt in superstitions of the devil. We don't want to see you doing devil shit. That's what I was going to say. That's exactly what I was going to say. I don't see it as like a damage. I see it as like one of those. Like whoever's in charge of making those type of laws and decisions. It's a very religious. Some old white dude. Name that is. And that's the thing. With other things. You got to think of who's making these laws. Alabama. These are old laws. All of these laws. This is Alabama on this episode. But hold on. All of these laws, I guarantee you, were written early 1900s, late 1800s, no matter what state he's going to give us. They just don't take them off the books. Nobody practices them. There's one for South Carolina. I ain't going to ruin your beat, but there's a really good one for Boston. I was going to say, there's a really good one for South Carolina that's kind of the same, I think. The Inch. We're going to get there eventually. Y'all keep going. No, I don't know that one. Yeah. Oh, we got to wait until M. All right, we're going to keep going. Mine is in South Carolina. I got one or two more I want to talk about. Confetti is illegal in Mobile. It is considered a public nuisance. It is illegal to possess or manufacture it in the city of Mobile. I wonder, does anybody know? I can understand that. And this will actually negate what I just said. This seems like a new law. This just seems something like... No, I bet you it isn't. It's literally. No. That's all confetti is. I bet. That's why I feel like it's not new love. Times Square did it until they found a new, you know, biodegradable friendly confetti. Well, I mean, I can assume that because it would fill up the sewers and, you know, with massive splinters and everything down there so they can't. All right, man. Ninja Turtles wrote that. We got to keep going, man, because these shit get dumber and dumber, dog. All right. You can't drive blindfolded. Clearly. Well, hold on. So again, somebody did that. Clearly. And that's why it's a law. In a Tesla. Playing dominoes on Sunday is illegal. Well, that's gambling. Gambling on Sunday. That makes sense. That makes sense. But the fact that they only did dominoes and not like gin and rummy, they're like... They're like niggas. Exactly. We're going
SPEAKER_00:to get
SPEAKER_01:you. Gotcha, bitch. You got to give us a second to talk about these laws. These are laws that could affect us one day, Trent. I'm never going to be in Mobile to play dominoes with confetti. You might be on Sunday. You might not be. I failed in life, dog. No disrespect to anybody from Mobile. No disrespect to Alabama as a whole. But if me personally, if I'm in Mobile, Alabama playing dominoes on a Sunday with confetti, I don't fuck up. Now, hold on. What if you're at the club? It's Saturday night. Hold on. In Alabama? Who goes to a club in Alabama on Saturday night? Everybody that lives in Alabama. I don't go to clubs in Atlanta, dog. Leave me alone. I think I'm going to go to a club in Alabama. We live in Atlanta. We live in Atlanta. Because we don't go to clubs doesn't mean other people don't go to clubs. Yeah, well, yeah, because when the lockdown started, they went there deep like prohibition. You were at the club on a Saturday night in Alabama. Fine girl decides to take you home. It's now Sunday. Wait, there's a girl that's going to take me home? I'm a grown ass. You're getting set up. No, I'm not doing that. Ain't about a girl taking you home? I'm a grown ass, man. I'm not doing that. That's not As a grown-ass man, you should have had a girl take you home. If she said, hey, you want to go home? I'll take her home. No, I'm done. I'm in. I'm in. Flames is in. I've had girls be like, you want to get out of here? I'm like, no. Oh, you're talking about like that. I thought you were talking about like, grab you by the arm, like, I'm taking you home. You're like, no, no, you're not. We got two more. We got two more. I only wish that would happen to me. Actually, three more, because these shits are stupid, though. It happened. You can't put ice cream in your backpack Fuck that, I'm going to do it. I don't know why a nigga put ice cream in his back pocket. Hey man, you ain't never had no ice cream cone that is just brand new and you're like, oh, I ain't got nowhere to put it. But you can put it in your front pocket? Fuck the front pocket, man. It'll smush the cone. I think we're going back to the religious over here. No, in your pocket. No, in your pocket. It's illegal. In the weed pocket? No, any pocket. It's illegal. Alabama wants to ensure you don't put an ice cream in your pocket. There used to be weird law around ice cream. Do you know why it's called the sundae? We talked about this on the High Class. I don't know that. The reason it's called sundae is because it was illegal to sell ice cream on sundaes. So one ice cream guy, I think in Ohio or something like that, put nuts and cherries and a banana on it.
SPEAKER_00:So it's a treat. So it's a
SPEAKER_01:split. So it's actually a split. Basically made fruit. And so he can sell fruit on sundae. With ice cream on it. So he'd call that the sundae. Sunday. Oh, that's tight. And that's why it's called the Sunday. Yep, that's why it's called the Sunday. All the more you know. So I'm assuming it's something to do with that. How are these laws implemented? I don't know if they are. None of these really get implemented. The last one I wanted to talk about was wearing a mustache in church is illegal. What do you mean wearing a mustache? Like a fake mustache? Or like flames couldn't go to church? Yeah, you can't wear a fake mustache to church. Why would you wear a fake mustache? Hey, Hey, man. Hey, man, hold on, hold on. Somebody was trying to get back in line for the communion one. A nigga. He was like, I am senior. I mean. It is not me. I bet you it's big as fuck, too. I am different. It's like. This is my brother. It's like this. It's like, it's all the way out here. And it's like, man. Why? Why are you talking like that? What are you talking about?
SPEAKER_00:We mean.
SPEAKER_01:I do not know this joke. I'm guessing it's something like that. All of these laws, somebody had, you know, laws aren't just made preemptively. And I bet you the majority of these were made so that children couldn't do dumb shit. Because we would do stuff like, I mean, I would. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was dumb laws according to the state. And this state was Alabama. Wait till we get to South Carolina. You have to just Listen to every episode until we get there. It's a great song. It is. It's a great jam. All right. Where are we to next? All right. Well, we should probably do M.P. Oren. Oh, Lord. Actually, you want to do... Let's do it. Let's go. Oh, no, we need number four. We need a JPEG for... Yeah, yeah. So we get everybody's... All right, we'll go, I guess, yeah. Trent, you know what to do. Oh, what do I do? You know what to do. What do I do? Oh. We're going to start it. Oh, what are we doing? Oh, we're doing NPR? Holy shit. I need a... No, you don't need that. What the fuck do you need my paper for? This is an adding of a sound effect. Magic's here, so I'm pressing. Oh, hold
SPEAKER_00:on. You're
SPEAKER_01:throwing me off, man. Shut up, man. Goddamn. Good news, everyone. I'm not starting until I get my intro. That's not my intro. No, it is not. And you know he ain't going to start with that. I don't know what you're saying. Trent is trying to pull some BS on me today, folks. It's not
SPEAKER_00:on him. I'm sorry, man. News team. Assemble. Alright, whatever. Thank you. We
SPEAKER_01:usually have a big intro. It's beautiful. Yeah. Oh, well. Okay, I'll give you one. All right. First things first. Marvel has introduced its first Jewish superhero. I don't really care. Next fucking story. Next thing. I really don't give a shit. None of us care. It's Moonlight. They asked the writer. I haven't seen it yet. I haven't either. So at first, they did make him Jewish. And the internet got mad. And then they found an interview with the writer. And they asked the writer, so Marvel's not making your superhero Jewish? Jewish and his response is like you know I'm paraphrasing he's like Marvel bought my comic book period like Marvel bought my comic book at that point at that point it doesn't matter what the fuck does it matter Marvel bought my comic book they paid him move on exactly it could have been a it could have been a chick for all he cared and it wasn't like it was a Jew he just had like there was like a few symbolism it wasn't like it played any different in his character it was just like oh he happens to be Jewish that's it so that's the superpowers I have no idea some of these He can haggle. No, no, no. Hold on, hold on, hold on. It's better. He's at the market like this. You guys got it wrong. He doesn't have to haggle. They just give it to him lower. Exactly. He's like, how much is this? All right. So anyway, on to actual fucking news that matters. Some Yale students sold$40 million in electronics. They steal it from Yale? while at a student at Yale. Like, literally, he would just say, like, he would buy stuff from there and was able to make, like,$40 million. Like, ideally, even if he's selling it at a discount, he's still racked a million dollars. Hey, man. Hey, man. That's a scammer, bro. Hey, man, good for him. That's a scammer. I don't know his name. I don't know his race. All we say is... Did he get caught? Yeah, of course he got caught. I'm pretty sure he's a white man. You got greedy, and that's why he got caught. I mean, you don't need$40 million, realistically. But that's how much net value. So the worth of it, they're obviously going to inflate it. No, but I'm just saying, yeah. So, you know, they buy 1,000 iPads for$100 a piece. Yeah. You know, this is an iPad each at$1,000. Yeah. Think about it. He at Yale. All right, I'm about to get all these credit cards, get all these. Then I'm buying all this shit with their money, like the scammers do. The same shit the scammers do and run it up. And he on campus. Now I can mark the price up to whatever. But what gets me, I know people that have gotten caught stealing like$20 worth of shit from work. You know,$100 from school. How the fuck do you get away with$40 million worth of shit? This is white.
SPEAKER_00:White.
UNKNOWN:White.
SPEAKER_01:Guess their crime again. Guess their crime. This is white. All right. Speaking of white people. Fuck, man. Speaking of white people. This year's Grammy-winning album for reggae music went to a group from Virginia named Soja. That's S-O-J-A, Soja. Soldiers of Jaws Army. Oh, God. You put James. It might as well be James. It might as well be James. This is their, I think, eighth album. Niggas can't have shit. Sure, okay. Niggas can't have shit. The third time a non-Jamaican group has won the Grammy. So it's a white band for real. First time, though, white band. I think they have like one quarter black guy. I don't know. They got a slash. That doesn't surprise me. I'm not going to sit here and hate on these guys. They're just doing what they love. What has white people not stolen? I said it. I won't look it up. That's going to be Bob Marley in 2018. Hold on. Here's my thing. I don't even think they tried to steal it. I think they were just a band that just liked playing reggae and having fun with it and it just happened. Have you heard of any of these? Have you ever heard of them? Yeah, I've heard of them. I've heard of them. Shout out to Spice, man. A lot of People's Mad Spice didn't win, man. But, hey, man, it don't matter, man. We all know the NCAA CP Support Awards is the ones that matter, man. Fuck the Oscars, man. You know what I'm saying? Let's go. Speaking of Oscars, that was the Grammys, but since we're on Oscars, we're not going to really stay on it. We got to talk about Will, man. I tried to stay away from it, but God damn, Will. Hold on, hold on. Just so we're on a time scale of when this happened. This happened about two weeks ago. We are now at the point when we're recording. That was two weeks ago? Yeah. That shit felt like it was two years ago. When we were recording it, he just got the ban. He's not allowed at the Oscars for the next 10 years. 10 years. This was released. Already won. Just so you guys know where we are and how come we're like... Already won. He won an Oscar. That's all that matters. We're going to double back on that one. We're going to double back on that NPR. Okay. What else? Elon now owns 9% of Twitter. Yeah. I mean, he finished whatever he wanted. That is not a controlling stock, but he still sits on the board. He's been tweeting. He's been tweeting. What do you mean not a controller stock? He owns the majority of the company. He's the highest. He has the most majority than anybody who owns. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. But it's only 51% is what you need to just make. No, but he can say whatever he wants. He can't say whatever he wants, but he can definitely influence. He can be like, I want to do this, and everybody can say, come on. You know what that means? It's not an assumption. Yeah, that was like two days after. He sent a tweet, not to cut you off, but I got to say this. He sent a tweet two weeks ago saying, hey, I'm tired of Twitter, B&O. cutting me off. And then he just bought it. And then he bought it. That's how savage he is. He can't dictate what... He can't be like, hey, I want this done. That's a real nigga. That's a real nigga. That's like when Kanye divorced an old girl and then bought the house next door. He was like, oh, you want to keep me for my kids? No, not that. This is... Light on that side. People through the blinds. Hold on. Hey, kids. Like Michael through the window. Exactly. Dancing in there with them boots on. You know what? On this one, I'll actually give Kanye the benefit of the doubt. He wanted to be close to his kids. Yeah, of course. Buying the house next door, I'll give him that more of just being a creepy fucking ex-husband. But back to... What were we talking about? I forgot what we were talking about. Elon. Elon didn't buy enough to actually make change. All he can do is suggest change, and then if he doesn't get it, threaten to sell his shares, which would drop Twitter's stock value a lot. Which means that he's going to be able to do whatever he wants. Hold on. What I'm basically saying is... this approach is, this is the temper tantrum approach. I know. If you don't do this, I'm going to fucking scream on the floor. But then he could be savage and still continue to buy. He's capped. He can only buy 15%. But to me, that's still like... Well, he only owns nine. He owns nine if he gets capped at 15%. That's the most anybody can own on Twitter. But to me, he ain't making change. He making change for him. I know. That's what's sad. He wants an edit button and to be able to not be taken down. I'm buying this shit just so I can do what I want to do. Man, That's how you know you're rich. If I can do what I want to do, I can influence everybody. That's how you know you're rich. But hold on. I'm not big on Twitter. I'm not there. I'm not. They don't have an edit button. Twitter is lit. This is one of the big things. What do you mean edit button? So basically I say you post something and you see that you can't go back. No, you can't. This is what always fucks up. Oh, maybe not. If you misspell something, you can't go in and fix it. You have to delete it and do the text again. The coffee was hilarious. But that's part of Twitter. It's a permanent record of everything. Editing does not, you know, it negates the fact that it's a permanent record. I see what you're saying. Yeah, that's why I'll be tweeting. That's why I'll be tweeting because I want to be able to do it. I keep on watching it. Fuck y'all. Alright, so what else? Um... Kentonji Brown is now a Supreme Court Justice. She got sworn in on Thursday. We're now a Saturday. Congratulations. So with that, I just want to ask. For life. Her position, so what do you think, everyone, what do you think her contributions are going to be? Specifically, the black community. I mean, really, she going to do whatever she can do. She going to do what they going to allow her to do at the end of the day. That's what all judges and politicians do. Hold on. This is a common... To fit their agenda. Obviously that, but the one thing about the Supreme Court, and I'm going to hold on to it, just being optimistic here, is the one unregulated thing. Copy. Classic court. Ideally, she won't have to worry about that. There are still judges now that, Clarence Thomas, one of them, he's like, give us an explanation. He's like, I don't have to explain shit. Fuck you. This is how I feel. They're that one branch. Obviously, I do think there is some, they're getting sworn in by people who have an agenda so they're going to find a judge that fits their agenda it doesn't change anything it's still going to be a 6-3 court the only thing that in what his thing is the perspective of a black woman now given some so with that there could be some you know because you let's say all of us are Supreme Court judges we all have to give our you know like you know how we feel about what we do by the time I hear yours you know let's say that's a different opinion that maybe I might not feel so strong about mine and I'm going to say on On that note, shout out to my mom. She just won city council in Chattanooga. So I kind of understand how that, in Chattanooga, Tennessee, by the way, home of the real. I kind of understand how coming around would be a thing. But I know at some point, if she's like, I don't want to deal with it, or I don't want to do it, this is what I want to do, they're not fit to tell her to shut the fuck up. Yeah, I think she's obviously, as a woman and as a black woman, she's going to have it harder than, you know. Of course. The fucking white guy in the court. Yeah. But she's going to take it hard and she's going to do it. So, you know, it's for the future. A hundred years from now, it won't be a story. I look at it kind of like the Obama effect. Yeah, and everybody was mad because he didn't do much and blah, blah, blah. Remember that first black girl went to school in Alabama. And speaking of which... Shout out to Obama because he's going to open the door for the real nigga that's going to get through probably later in my life. Like probably on the back end of my life. That's when we're going to get a real nigga president. And you're like, yo, man, I ain't hearing all that shit. He's like, yo, if I'm doing deals with anybody, it's Africa. Exactly. You know what I'm saying? And you know, you talk about, like you said, the first black girl in Alabama. Funny enough, shout out to my mom again. She was the first black woman in Gainesville, Georgia, where she grew up in an integrated school. That's what's up. Yeah. But a lot has happened.
SPEAKER_00:Shout out to your mom. She's a true mom. We're very proud to hear that. For real, for real.
SPEAKER_01:Some drunk driver, I actually know this story very well, tweets, she's done it more than once, that she's the best drunk driver in the world.
SPEAKER_00:Tight. Congratulations. She
SPEAKER_01:did it. About a week later, she got pulled over. And for some, I don't know, I actually know the reason. As she's getting pulled over, before they can, like, question her for being drunk. Yeah, of course. There's like some kind of like serious, obviously I'm not saying that DUI is a serious crime because it definitely is. Of course. I've been hit by a drunk driver. Something that, you know, like a shootout or something like more that took the cops' attention. They dropped what they were doing, let this girl go and just hop in the car and went to go deal with something that was happening down the road on the highway. She gets, starts her car, gets back on the road, hits and kills those cops. And so now the headline is girl that tweets I'm the best drunk driver in the world So the cops let her go because they had obviously a more important, or what they deemed to be more important task. And then they get killed because they didn't get her off the road. Wow, that's fucked up. If you're still driving fucking drunk out there, you are to me like just the law of... I've had a drink or two and driven. Not saying that's drunk driving. We've all... It can be, but I'm talking about shit-faced. Well, and you know, it's funny, I have a story about that. Like, complete, like, that's just the most selfish fucking thing I've ever heard. Like, staying under the limit and driving is dangerous and can be, you know, each one of us has our opinion of that. Anything can, you know, sway you, but like, when I was 15, I was on my street riding my bike, you know, as you do as a child. Maybe I was 14. And then, you know, you see a car come down the road, so you get on the sidewalk, you know, as you're supposed to do. Next thing I know, I'm flying over a light post. Damn. And I hit the ground, a drunk driver hit me. Damn. Yeah. So, fuck y'all. Yeah. I don't fuck with that shit. I mean, I was good, you know, not hurting or anything like that. You know, my motto is don't drive drunk. I don't drive drunk, dog. I don't drink and drive either, dog. My reckless father said back in the day, man, fuck that nigga. Hey, man, I hope this nigga, all right, man, shout out to you, dog. This nigga say, yo, man, I don't never, it's like, it's drinking before you drive. It's like, if you're drinking while you drive, you good because by the time you get to your spot, you drunk. I don't think that's how that works. So drinking and driving ain't the problem. It's drinking before you drive. When I was in first grade, I was like, yo, this nigga. When I was in first grade, they introduced dare to us in first fucking grade. Yeah, I remember dare, yeah. So the cops talked to us about drinking and driving. But not really explain, like no We're in first grade. Nobody knows what alcohol is. Yeah. They didn't explain those. We just think drinking, you know, they just assume that. So then you're in your car, which is. I honestly believe that half the problems. Which is shit, like not being able to drink. Half the problems, drug problems that we have is, you know, in our generation is because of dare and like. Yeah, they put that shit on. Like they really. Lack of information. I didn't know what alcohol was at this age. No, they give enough information. But that weekend, we're at, you know, the whole family's in the car. Yeah. My dad, this is in New York. He stops in the fucking avenue, double parks, runs in. to go get a Pepsi from the convenience store for all of us. Pepsi, soda, whatever. Blah, blah, blah. Gets in the car. We're driving. I'm sitting in the back. I'm not driving. I see my dad pop open that Pepsi and drink and I flip shit. You know that moment where you think, imagine your dad is breaking the law. I had such a big panic attack. I swear to God, my parents had to flag down a police officer. Avenue was very busy so it wasn't hard. And tell Tell me that it wasn't illegal to drink Pep's beer. Alcohol. You had to put your skirt down. Yes, like, I was in... You don't know what my dad did? You don't know what my dad did? I'm about to say, you know what my dad did? My dad was like, yo, I'm drunk, here's a key. You know what I'm saying? But that's what I'm like, I thought my dad was that kind of like, are you going to beat mom after this? My old man would crack that bitch up like, shit, go ahead and get your son. Shit, like, I... alright so get us home hold on next it ain't funny but shit you better get us home we came from different backgrounds it's so crazy hold on I do want to say before we finish on I do want to say I still got a lot to go it's so fucking crazy how things were I was just talking to somebody earlier about this how things were for us growing up as opposed now and I feel I do kind of feel some kind of resentment because everything is so political correct and I've been raised to like as a black man to not have emotion even as a man I mean generally you know growing up the Disney movies be like you gotta be a man you can't have emotion you gotta you gotta work hard you gotta you know take care of all this stuff right and then we get into this new age where it's like nah there is no constraints there is no conformity everybody can be who they want to be there them us we you know what I'm saying it's like what the fuck is going on man like what the fuck bro like my whole life is a lie I was talking to this girl I just met this chick and I was just talking to this girl you know we talking about you know backgrounds and shit because I like to get a background check on a chick before I start messing with her oh I got a great story about that everything like that so you know I'm telling her you know shit I you know went through growing up and how I grew up she was like damn you don't go talk to you like you don't need therapy you don't talk to nobody I was like for what she was regular like that's like and she was looking at me like what a like she almost wanted to cry, like, yo, you... Like, you good? Yeah, I'm like... Nah, it is crazy, because, like, even now, like, I take my girl back home, you know, and we go back home with the kids and all that stuff, and she be sitting there like, damn, you went through all this. I be like, yeah, this is where that happened, that happened, oh, yeah, like, da-da. She was like, what? I be like, and then I realized, like, not everybody had a hard time. I ain't saying, hold on, hold on. Like, not everybody grew up in trauma, dog. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's what, like, you don't realize growing up and being used to trauma, you don't realize not everybody is exposed to it. But then there's different levels of trauma, too. I went on, like, I didn't date Jewish girls at all. Like, I still barely ever get the chance to. And I think I was, like, 30-something when I first, like, dated a Jewish girl. I bet you it was horrible for you. And, yes. And we're having, like, you know, like, one of our second, third dates, we're just talking about, like, you know, basically, like, what Trent did, about, like, oh, that happened here, that happened here. And I I'm just like, you know, something happened that reminded me of some anti-Semitic thing that happened to me.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:In like middle school or something. And I bring it up and she's like, that never, I was literally ready to exchange stories, like battle stories with this person. Like, I have this story. You're going to give me a story that I'm going to have that story. And she was like, nothing like that has ever happened in my life. And I was like, all right, you know, maybe you just, you got lucky. And then like, as I'm getting older and like dating other Jewish women, same fucking thing. Like I thought we would have battle stories to go against it. It's like, no, you're kind of fucked. You kind of had it fucking rough, though. Speaking to that, on therapy, I don't see myself needing therapy for any of the shit that happened. This is my therapy, ladies and gentlemen. But I'm not anti-therapy. I'm actually seeking one right now. I'm not anti-therapist. But not for what happened because the way I look at it, as fucked up as some shit happens, it's made me the person I am today. And I really like who I am today. I love the person that I am. And as fucked up as it was... I don't know. I don't want to change who I am. Slow clap? Nice. You get the nice slow clap. You got to play the music, then the slow clap. Nah, no music. What you think on it? Yo, what you think on it? A lot of things going through my head right now. I knew you was kind of vibing with that conversation. That's why I asked you that, because I see you like, you know. Shit. Let us know, man. Nah, it is. it is crazy like the way it is now man versus how it was as a kid man like you know like and I like motherfuckers don't know like motherfuckers don't but then it's crazy because like we post stuff for our page or whatever the case may be you know we share clips audios and then people are like what what's going on it's like if you can't relate to it say that but don't get offended because you can't relate to it you know what I'm saying see that's the whole thing with the internet but that's what I'm saying it's like you gotta be able you gotta understand like I can't relate to a lot of my motherfucking white counterparts that I work with, you know what I'm saying, in certain aspects, but I at least try, you know what I'm saying, or at least recuse myself from the situation when I can't relate. You know what I'm saying? Like, when I can't relate to something, but I don't sit there and be like, oh, da-da-da-da-da, I'm offended. Like, nah, bro, I'm black in America, dog. If I got offended, I wouldn't go outside. That's just what it is. This is something I've noticed, and this is only because, and I'm sure I can't speak on the black community, but this is something I noticed, and this is not just me as an Israeli this is big on the immigrant community like we all you know whether it's Israeli or Hispanic or you know fucking New Guinea coming here to this country we all kind of do the same things it's different you know settings but it's the same thing like beating your kids you know like leaving a 12 year old to watch the fucking you know like all these little things even how we eat and we're made to feel weird about it by white people Americans when as I've gotten older I've learned that white Americans Americans are kind of the weird ones like the more I talk to like different immigrant families like Muslim Asian no matter where you come from I'm like dude your childhood was just like mine but I always felt weird by with white people because some of the shit they ate said they're really good at making you feel like just because it's not their experience yeah like your culture is weird to me it's just like get the fuck out of here as a Gullah Geechee American you know what I'm saying from Charles Sasaki Alana, you know what I'm saying? What up to my people back home? I know, you know what I'm saying? Shout out to the Jack McDowell. Fuck wrong with them, boy. You already know, man. We back up in this bitch. Anyway. Back to this. It's accent change. Fuck you, nigga. Because growing up back home, it's like, yo, you talk like that, you ignorant. You know what I'm saying? Because it's a broken dialect. It's a broken English. So we don't pronounce a lot of our words. Even now, when I pronounce a lot of words at work, people will be like, oh man, we correct you, you know what I'm saying? I'm like, hey man, don't do that, man. Don't ever correct me. Because they don't even correct immigrants, dog. I've seen Mexican, you know, Spanish dudes come to work and be like, I don't know, and not pronounce the word correctly, and be like, oh, okay. But like, when I say the word ask, I say ax. They say ask, you know what I'm saying? It's ask. I'm like, don't ever do that again. Don't ever correct my English ever again. Because, just be Because that wasn't your experience doesn't mean that's not my experience. And actually, we talked about this on the first season of the High Class Dirtbags podcast. The original pronunciation of the word was ax. I was very surprised to learn this. And then they changed it to ax. I thought it always was ax. It used to be ax. Ax. A-X-S. A-X-S or it's not ask? A-S-K. It used to be ax. You know what I'm saying? But then they changed it to ask. You know, it's not like I've never even thought of that like growing up you know like as again going back to the immigrant thing like there's plenty of people that I know that you know even non-Israeli like and they'll say something wrong in English and I'll take it as like you know it's you know whatever in a sense like you know it's them not they you know that kind of shit or you know like it's you know it's protecting so they get better at speaking English because it's not their first language they want to learn and I've had people be like oh you shouldn't do that I'm like the fuck you shouldn't like I'm learning Spanish and if I'm saying something wrong I would like to be corrected so I'm saying it right but what I'm saying is like for that same person to say that what I'm doing is offensive we're obviously going with a Karen or something like that but then correct Trent on his first language speaking abilities And that be totally fine. Only is just to me, it just shows the mentality of these kind of people. Depending on what region you from certain words, you just going to carry no matter how professional you, you know what I'm saying? The only people who are corrected on a daily basis is black folks. But what I'm getting at is like, and everybody's like, what's the problem with that? And I was like, well, you know, people are, you know, I had a conversation yesterday. Let me, let me digress. I, had a conversation yesterday where I was like I can go up and say something in a certain way and it's not there's no malice in it but I all of a sudden now am like oh you're being aggressive and yeah I know and when you speak loud like cause as you know black folks and as any type of non non non you know white version of something we speak loud that's what every every you know Everything does. All of our cultures do. But when they do it, they don't give a shit. Yeah, I have to learn how to work. And it really bothers me because you have to go to work and become a character of yourself. That's something that I've had to check. But then you're Jewish, Israeli, and you're from New York. So it's like, that's a lot, bro. What I'm about to say is- You'd be like up here, and I'd be like, damn, Oren, you good? You'd be like, yeah, I'm fine. And I'd be like, what the fuck just happened? This is actually- This is, I'm going to get like, obviously paraphrasal, but this was an actual conversation. Like I approached somebody and said something like, why are you yelling? I'm like, I'm whispering right now. And they're like, I know, but you're still yelling. And you're like, how the fuck am I whispering? And then you get mad. How am I whispering and yelling at the same time? Like this makes, and what it is, is I've learned ever since that, I pointed to you, like you were the one who said he wasn't the one who did it. But it's, it's, I speak faster when I get mad. You know what I mean? Like I'm more direct and more, And that just... You're kind of yelling now. I feel like you're a little hot for it, bro. I can see that. This actually happened yesterday when I get on a new job and I'm not going to say her name because I don't know. But she's Jewish. And I hug her, I see her in the rest of the camera department and I was like, hey guys, just so you know, so and so and I are Jewish. So when we're having conversation, you might see that that we're yelling at each other, we're just talking. All is good over here. Just move along. So do you have to announce that, though? It was a joke. The reason I have said that is because her and I have been told by other co-workers, like, hey, you guys need to stop yelling. We're just talking to each other. Whenever I go into a show, there was a specific show when I worked on in Nashville, I was in Tennessee, and I had to tell them, I was like, hey, look, so I said, are you y'all can get two questions about black people. That's it. And then that's it. And so, because I was the only black guy in the camera department, and they were like, well, you know, and I was like, so let's just get the alchemist out of the way right now. No, I'm not your brother. I'm not your bro, your brosif, your broham, or whatever versions of it. Like, you know, your homeboy. Like, you know, and I'm like, I call, I'll be like, yo, I'll be like, yo, homeboy. Like, no. Like, you know. And they're like, yeah, because the director of photography was like, yo, yo, what's up, homie G? And I was like, homie G? I was like, what the fuck? They always call me Terrence. And I'd be like, oh, so that shit. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I want to know, what are the questions? What was the number one asked question? But this is how you shut them boys down when they do shit like that. I just look dead at them and be like, oh, that's your go-to black guy name? And they'd be like, oh. Yeah, then they freeze. They'd be like, oh. Downloading. But continue. This is a deep conversation, though, because now I want to know. You know what I'm saying? We'll come back to that. No, but it's a deep conversation. I want to know what the question is. I mean, it's mostly like, you know, my favorite thing is like, how does your hair do that? What's your hair question? Yeah, and I'm like, or my favorite thing is, can I touch your hair? No, you can't touch my hair. I've dated plenty of women. You know, I've dated plenty of women and only three women that I've ever dated has been able to touch my hair. I don't let people touch my hair. I don't care what people touch my hair. You see what I'm saying? This is all new to me. That's my downfall. Exactly. I don't let people touch my hair. And I'm just like, I'm like, no. You know, I'm like, no. And women get, you know, I don't care. I don't care about them women. They'll at least be like, well, why can't I? I'm your girlfriend. I'll be like, no. I'll be like, you know what? I'll be like, you know, why don't you take your fitted cap off, you know, your screen door off, and then come hide and let me touch your hair. I'm in the opposite. Peel that shit off. I don't do that, bro, because it's energy, bro. Like, I don't want certain energies in my hair, bro. Like, because your hair is close to your brain, bro. I mean, think of it like Samsung. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Like, granted, you know, we don't know if we're going to have a full head of heroin world or whatever. But right now, it's mine. And I got a whole bunch of it. So here's, I do have a question. Is, because I'm, you know, those who've been watching the podcast. Please be over here sad. Don't take the hat off. Take the hat off. Show them why you're sad. I had the dress. Show them why you're sad. I had too many bitches touching my dress.
UNKNOWN:I didn't know that was what it was. I didn't know that was what it was.
SPEAKER_00:I had all these bitches touching my shit.
SPEAKER_01:The world wouldn't know I don't know why you said that. They're poisoning my shit. Y'all just told me they're poisoning my shit. So hold on. Hair is new to me. I've always had a buzz cut since I was like 13. I'm now 38 with a few inches of hair. And I want everybody to fucking touch it. My girlfriend's like, I don't want anybody to touch it. And I listen to her. I'm not letting anybody touch it. Fuck that. I'm going to touch it. The only thing I can think of is when I was like 20, one of my good friends got breast implants. And you didn't even have to know her. You could have just been like, ooh, I want to see. She'd be like, nice. She just wanted to show it off. At 20? Yeah. White girls get no jobs at 16, bro. I mean, not even white girls. People just get no jobs now, man. At 20? Yeah, that's right. No, but you also got to think, this was when I was 20, so this is fucking, you know. That was at the beginning of Pamela Anderson and all that shit happening. Yeah, my friend went from an A-cup to a triple D, and she was like, what do you think about these? I was like, those look big and fake. And she was like, well, touch them. And I touched them. I was like, these things are hard like rocks. That's exactly what it was. It was like, am I? Why going through the stage right now? Did I just get new titties and I just want everybody to see and touch it? And then eventually I'll be like, you guys just bitter and nobody touch my hair. Yeah. I'm telling you, man. When you start saying that, people start looking at you weird. They're like, oh. And I'm like, yeah. I'm like, my hair is magical. Don't be touching my shit. I'm a germaphobe as it is anyway. I know you're not. Motherfuckers be hitting me with that shit all the time. Like, oh, your hair. And you know who thinks They can do it all the time. Women think they're like, oh, hey. And I'm like, yo, what are you doing? And they're like, oh, well, you know, I just thought. I don't have motherfucking sneaker touch, dog. Like, motherfuckers be like, I just want to touch it. But you can feel it. I can feel all of this. At the ends of it, you can literally feel it. And they'll be like, when someone brush past you, which is why now on set, I keep my hair back and a hood. That's what's only out in the front. Stop your bitching, black boy. Stop your bitching, black boy. Get back to work. Exactly. Don't show no fucking emotion. Don't show no fucking What are you doing, man? You can't feel a certain type of way in this world. My shit was down past hip. Yeah, man. I remember, man. I inspired you for real. You let all them bitches figure fuck your shit, man. I inspired you to even get a dress. He want to be like me so much, man. It's okay. It's okay. He want to be like me. Hey, man. Take that hat off. Show the world why you mad. All right, so back to NPR. Come on, boy. I had to get that motherfucker back because that motherfucker was talking shit a couple episodes ago. I told his ass I was going to get him back. So a Colombian farmer finds$60 million in cash and turns it into police. I'm keeping it. Hold on. And with this headline, I'm going to predict a future headline. Colombian farmer killed by cartels for turning in$60 million in cash to police. I guarantee that's going to happen after that. How do you not keep$100 million, get out of the country, and then, you know.$100 million? I'm keeping all of it. I'm saying it. I'd be like, oh, no. I would have saw him and be like, yeah, I'm just going to go ahead and bury this back. Yeah. All right, so. Guess that crime. I ain't saying I'm going to take some. The second I show up to work the eight-hour shift knowing I got$600 million, I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? I'm not showing up. I show up and be like, they'll be like, all right, guys. All right, guys. So we're going to roll it up. Like, yeah, nah. And I just leave. And they're like, you ain't taking your stuff? I leave everything. Backpack, wallet. I leave everything. I don't need it. I throw my keys or something. Exactly. Here, brand new car for you, bro. Yo, you can have it all, bro. Take it all, dog. I'm good. All right. So instead of just giving you the news, I want to see how much you guys have paid attention to the news over the week. What? So the next three stories, I'm going to ask you guys a question. See if you know. Baseball ended its strike this week. They did. But with this year's baseball season, the classic snack, Cracker Jack, Has introduced a new snack. Brother snack. Can any of you guess what it is? No, that would have been great. I'm going to say nigga snack, nigga. I'm going to say it. Cracker Jacks introduces a new line of snacks. A new line of snacks. A new line of snacks. I don't know. They only made popcorns. They made pretzels. Let's go with the name, not what the snack is. The new name of a snack. Cracker dogs? I don't know. Coon puffs? That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. I don't know. Can you imagine asking for that? What do you want? Oh, shit. I want the puffs. The puff things. The puff things. Nah, go ahead and say it. Nah, you can say it. Snap his neck. Cracker Jack. Let me get the crackers. Anything? Cracker Jills. Mind saying it's the same thing. It's just going to be a Cracker Jack box and a Cracker Jills box. Man, they had a great opportunity. They should have Cracker Jack. Exactly. Cracker Karens. Yeah, exactly. That's it right there, man. Cracker Karens. A box full of Cracker Karens. Oh, that's too good. That's too good. All right. What company in New York decided to, voted to unionize? Amazon. Amazon. Man, do you guys do pay attention? Yeah, come on, man. Do you guys know about this part, though? This is the cool part. I got to pay attention, too. With, it was the union organizer. Yeah, even though I don't know this shit, it's something. Two years ago, somebody was one of the people that tried to get the organized, the union got fired. They gave you some bullshit, but it was basically because it was one of the union. Yeah, of course. Now he is the union president. Yeah, I know. It's great, right? He's fighting Amazon. I see. He's a black man. He's a bro. Yeah, I know. Good job, bro. All right. And this one's kind of funny. They found out in leaked emails and gossip and everything like that that the employees at Meta have a name from Mark Zuckerberg. Do any of you know what it is? Maybe. No. It's the devil. Close. Yeah, I was going to say. The iron. of Sauron. Oh yeah. I can see that. The fiery booty hole in the sky. The fiery booty hole in the sky. Here comes the fiery booty hole. The bright eye in the sky. The fiery brown eye in the sky. And there are a few other things but the last thing I want to talk about because we haven't talked about this yet and it's been happening for a few months. Inflation. So In 1950-something, the game show came out,$64,000 question. And it was basically like, you know, it became a phrase. I didn't know that. You've never heard what's a$64,000 question, a$64,000 answer? No, I'm not that old. All right. But anyway, it's something that you, if you ever come across it, it's basically like still said to this day. Okay. It's like, you know, it's a$64,000 question. I was like, what's a million dollar question? That's, oh, okay. But that's kind of where they got it from. It used to be 64. So somebody wanted to know what's today's equivalent of$64,000. Again, 1950, most of our parents were born in probably like the early 60s, late 50s. Yeah. The equivalent now is to today's market with inflation being$6,800,000. Yeah, so basically... So basically... Yeah, so basically money... So my thing... And basically, how many years is that? Seven years? Hold on. That inflation between 1955 and now... 60 years....is at a pace that might not match the next 50, you know, actually 70 years. Well, but that's the thing. It's like, think about like how when we were younger,$10 used to go a long way. But that's what I'm saying. You get a whole grocery cart full of shit. Exactly. The$100, now$1,000 ain't shit.$1,000 gets you some groceries for the week. Exactly. That's exactly. So basically, people who were born of this are still alive. They, you know, like a nickel was what they used to get a Coke for. Now a Coke is$2. You get a Coke, a We were born when it was like 50 cents to a dollar. When we get older, it's going to be like a Coke,$46. But you know what? When I was younger, I used to remember going to, there was a store down the street from me, and I would go in there and I would take a dollar and I would get two bags of Cool Ranch Doritos and two Zebra Cakes that used to be about this big. 25 cents? Yeah, 25 cents. Them motherfuckers. 30 years later, you can't even walk into a store with a dollar in your hand. You can't do anything. You can't even get gum, bro. Gum,$1.29. What? Exactly. I mean, the Arizona stuff used to be$0.99 for that can. And now they don't put it on the can anymore. No, it's still$0.99, but there's some bullshit in the can. Exactly. And I'm just like, yo, what the fuck? But I thought about that because when I went in one day, it was, I don't know, 15 years after I did that, I was like, yo, what the hell is this? I was like, why is it this small? Why is it$0.75? There is also, hold on, this is also. It's also a term you touched on. They call it shrinkflation. And it's companies... It's actually a term. Look it up. It's basically companies want to keep the same price of a product. You know, Snickers bar a dollar, let's say. So instead of charging it$1.25, they'll just make it smaller so they can still make the same profit. It's all bullshit, but it's mostly like... That's how they do it. Basically, inflation boils down to greed. Yeah, man. These motherfuckers, man. They be getting... I'm telling you, dog. I'm telling you, dog. These niggas done jacked the gas up. These niggas got mad gas. They like, yo, fuck it. We still going to put this bitch$5. Let's recoup some of this money we losing. It used to cost me about$50 to fill up my Jeep. It cost me$100.$96.37. It is part to the inflation. It is part to what's going on overseas. Speaking of that, we should talk about Ukraine because it's still going on. I don't want to bring it up. Man, we got to talk about Will Smith. Hold on. I'm just trying to get over these things. Will Smith. Ukraine is going on. Shit is going crazy. That's our update. But hold on. Let me just add. We already talked about Ukraine. I just want to say. Fuck you, Ray. No offense. Russian forces are starting to seem weaker. Ukraine looks stronger. Moving on. We want to go back to Will Smith? No. Oh, we want to wait. Paralyzed man wakes up from a coma and using his brain. They had some kind of sensory thing or something like that. First thing he asked for was, I want a beer. Yeah. Thought that'd be pretty cool. That was all right. Yeah. Sounds like. And that's about it. Nah, I want to talk about Will Smith, though. Because the fact is that Will Smith, all right, my dog Gotti Designs got to dip out, man. He got to go design some shit. You know what I'm saying? He got to go design some shit. It's got to work. It's got to work, man. I appreciate you for sliding through. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. You already know. Oh, and also, before we go, before we go, this is an important one. The Congress voted to legalize recreational marijuana nationwide with just waiting on the Senate to okay, maybe it will happen. It's not going to happen. It's not, but... All the people are like, and I'm like, yeah, that's true. It's becoming a yearly thing. We've already had this. This already happened once before, that marijuana is closer and closer to getting legalized. We're just keeping up to date with it. And if they legalize it, they should let out everybody who's in jail for it. In some states, the people who were convicted of marijuana marijuana charges would be the first to have dibs on licenses. What the... Oh, they don't have licenses in jail? No, no. I'm talking about people who have charges. Obviously, the... You're talking dealership. Most people, you know... God damn. There's a lot of people that have marijuana charges. So, I'm saying, instead of somebody who is never kept away from somebody who is very paid... But what if they just like smoking a... What if they own... You mean like they need a license to sell it? Yeah, like if you want... You know, you have a liquor license to sell liquor. What if they don't want to sell it? What if they just want to smoke it? Oh, no. We're talking about in the business capacity. Smoke and eat it. Whatever it is people do. I don't smoke and drink, but more prior to people who do. You know what I'm saying? All right. I think that's it. That's it, man. That's it. Goddamn. That is it. Let's go to Will Smith. There's a lot on this one. We haven't done it in three weeks. You can't read everything. I didn't. I actually skipped the UFO
SPEAKER_00:one.
SPEAKER_01:There's a UFO one? Yeah, there's a UFO one you motherfuckers don't know about. Sleep tight. I'm going to sleep. I thought I was watching I should see it in for real. Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm sorry, I don't want to skip this one. Hold on. The Roach Wrangler? That's not something else. We got to talk about that shit another time, brother. The Roach Wrangler is a legend. A myth. Can we talk about that? We're going to talk about the Roach Wrangler. We're going to get to it. Here it is. Everybody seen the fucking Oscars or not? You've seen the clips of the Oscars. That's what I want to talk about. If you haven't, you're fucking just an idiot who lives on The Rock, so I'll explain it to you. But thank you for tuning into our show, by the way. Man, we're not going to explain this to him. Will Smith slapped Chris Rock on the Oscar stage. We're not going to spend a whole fucking hour talking about this shit. What I want to say is straight up, after everything that's coming out, because this is two weeks after the fact, we have not podcasted since then, so I just wanted to say this. That nigga's a sucker, man. You's a sucker for that. Will Smith is a sucker for that, dog. Jada Pinkett came out a couple of days later saying, I wish she did didn't do that he overreacted this is what I'm talking about right here and now as a black man we are raised our whole lives to not show emotions especially not show emotions that can fuck up the bag in the heat of the fucking moment and when you do that for fucking 40 years in Hollywood Will Smith just to throw it all away in one fucking night though congratulations dog I don't know what that is I don't know what I don't know what deeper shit whatever the fuck is going on but that's some sucka shit dog and I'm sorry. I don't agree with his actions one bit. I do think there is... We're going to say our piece. I do think that there is something deeper in here and Will Smith is... I don't know him but we've known him for 40 years. He is genuinely a nice guy. I do believe Will Smith nine out of ten times wants to... Hold on. Let me get to what I'm saying. Wants to do the right thing. And people couldn't turn... There's certain people in a person like that life that could turn you in to a sucker. Hey, man, you know what it is? You know what happened? That's what happened. Let me finish my part. You got your part. You got your part. Let me say it. He walked in the crib and... Shut up, bitch! So, as I was saying, I think he's just got some marital issues that... Hey, man. Don't bring that shit to work. Let me finish what I'm saying. He was completely fucked for what he did for that. It was completely uncalled for. I can see why he did it. He's just trying to get the love of his wife, which is something that nice persons, you know. I think he just needs to toughen up. Not by smacking somebody, but toughen up with what's going on in the fucking house and talk to, you know. I'm not going to speak on his marriage. I think he took it out on his marriage out on Chris. I am going to speak on the fact that that nigga did some sucker shit. I'm not going to speak on... I still think this shit was fake. That shit just looked... I don't care. That shit looks like some Fugazi. I know what Fugazi look like. business. I know a fake slap. I've seen fake slaps for 20 years and that was not no fake slap. Even if the smack was real. They could use a real smack. Did you think that was fake though at first? Because he kind of... I saw the shot. I saw the shit live and I was like oh this nigga just slapped me. Immediately afterwards he said keep my wife name out your fucking mouth. This is a PSA man. That made it more Fugazi. I do like that we have somebody to take this. Anytime a black man or a black woman says hit you and they immediately turns their back to you and go sit down where they was at before or prior to hitting you and says keep my name out your fucking mouth my mama's name out your fucking mouth they serious what black man gonna do that after I slap a nigga but hear me out though hear me out though hold on hold on the reason I thought it was straight cause how he just was like la la la la when he walked up there but then when he walked up there and he He buttoned his jacket, unbuttoned his jacket, smacked him, hard slapped him, and then buttoned his jacket back again, and then walked off stage. And then we sat down. I was like, oh, shit. You know what? To speak on how he walked up, one of the reasons why I don't think it's fake is because if it was fake, they would have used a comedian that was not. We got to remember, Will Smith. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Will Smith, at one point or another in his life, trained to punch like Muhammad Ali. Chris Rock was perfect. Chris Rock. I don't know if any of you guys ever worked with him. I remember that. He is like 100 pounds. Yeah. He is tiny. But did you see the video of him showing a little kid how to slap? He slapped a little kid. He slapped Chris Rock. But let me finish what I'm saying. If they were going to make it a fake and plan this out, you would want a comedian. You would want The Rock. You'd want somebody that wouldn't slap on a date. But I'm just saying. I'm just using an example by name first. You would want somebody that... Channing Tatum, who's a funny guy, comes out there and says that you would want somebody who is a little more... You get what I mean? They make movies. But it's not fake, though. I know what you're saying, but it's not fake. In the moment, everybody was like... When it happened, yes. But once he sat down, I was like, it's not fair. That one made it more faker to me when he sat down. To me, I think he should have just said that. All right, which leads us to our next motherfucker segment and our last segment of the day. We got to get through this motherfucker. And that is... That's a no for me, dawg. That's a no for me. And that was definitely a no for me. You know what I'm saying? So, with that being said, this week on... That's a no for me, dog. The first question is, would you... Would you slap your boss at a company dinner over a joke? I'm not slapping nobody over a joke. That's the whole thing about even... If he was going to get down to the bottom, if it was fake or real. Okay, let's say if it was real. You still not about to slap nobody over no joke. Hold on. I will... Let's... Over... Hold on. Over not even a joke. You're not about to go up on stage and slap somebody over a thing. Hold on. You're not. But when you're looking for a woman's acceptance, you would. I've seen niggas do crazy shit, dog. I'm telling you. I'm going to say this, though. If it was me, if it was me, I would have caught that nigga outside. But here's the thing. For what, though? No, no, no, no, no. Not to slap him, but I'd be like, yo. But for what? But see, hear me out, though. What made you feel some type of way about what? what he said that make you want to see him outside. No, no, not me, but I'm saying... What would make Will Smith... Hold on, hold on. You talking about if he was Chris Rock or Will Smith? No, like, so what? It depends, because it actually depends on, you know, because Chris Rock was clearly disrespected as fuck, but then, like, Will Smith also felt like he was disrespected. What was he disrespectful on? No, no, he was disrespected. When he got fucking slapped? No, no, no, I thought you said disrespectful. No, no, no, I'm sorry. I slur my words a lot. You know... You know, trust to the heart. You know, I got my block knocked off, you know, a year ago. You drunk again? You drunk again? Yeah, I know, right. But I don't know, like, I wouldn't, you know, well, fuck it, I ain't got to be politically correct. Nope. I wouldn't. Not here. Not for Jada, for what Jada has done for him that is good, but also what she's done for him that is bad. This is toxic. Ain't no way in the world. That's as toxic as it comes, bro. I mean, just think about it. about the whole thing, her whole entanglement. But hear me out, though. Yes, they weren't together. Yes, they were separated. You go on a whole two-year program worrying about fucking another nigga. But hear me out, though. Hold on. Hear me out. I'm going to wrap this up real quick. Regardless if that happened or not, she didn't know how to believe him, and then she went on that, you know, what I call that voodoo witch doctor table, you know, that shit. If they're like, hey, Magic, we want you to come to Red Tip and tell you, hell nah. I ain't got shit to say to
SPEAKER_00:y'all. Well, don't you want
SPEAKER_01:to come here and heal? No. I can heal at my crib in my fucking jacuzzi. You see what I'm saying? I am building a jacuzzi in my house. Exactly. It's going to be hard as fuck. You know, but like, you know, I'm like, I'm not new. Next thing I know, I wake up at four in the morning, water bubbling outside. What the fuck is that? Like, it's fucking Trenton. You know, like that type of deal. But like, I don't, I don't, I'm going to use the app. If I'm in the jacuzzi, I'm Ben Truitt. You're going to have the app? Ben Truitt. Okay, I'm going to say... That's a no from me, dawg. But hold on. One thing we didn't say, and it's obvious, but Chris Rock is a comedian. He is paid to tell jokes. Of course. At the Oscars. That's what I'm saying. And we're in a room full of... That's sucker shit, man. That's what I say, man. It's sucker shit, man. It's sucker shit. It's sucker shit, man. I'm sorry. I don't give a fuck if... I am from, like, goes back to what we were saying earlier in the podcast. I am from a certain era. Same here. Real recognize real at all times. If you real, you real at all times. You not real 98% of the day you get home and that 2% you taking the shit. You like, yo, I'm going to get on the internet and I'm going to be a fake motherfucker. Like, you real 100% of the time, bro. Same thing can be a cloud about being a sucker, dog. If you do some sucker shit at any point in time, you a sucker, bro. I'm sorry. And that was... some sucker shit, dog. And I don't know if the RPA would agree with it in this situation, but anything... What's the RPA? This right here. No, you definitely know the RPA. That is sucker shit, dog. And that ain't just like a minor infraction your first time doing some sucker shit. That's like, okay, code red, level five, motherfucker sucker shit, dog. So with that being said, we got to move the fuck on. But let's get back to the question. Where'd you slap your boss's wife? Hey, my boss is not a comedian. So, depending on what he said about my wife, yeah, I'd still smack a boss. Nah, I ain't gonna smack a boss. Like, if it's completely, like, not a joke, like a disrespectful... No, I'm gonna still have to slap you. Because if you come on some shit, you come on there... I mean, it'd be different. Exactly, like, hey, so we're here to... And all of a sudden, he's like, orange wife's a fatty. And I open like, bitch! So now we gotta scrap. You're not a comedian. That's when you meet him outside. That's when you meet him outside. You see what I mean? That was a good take. And then after you beat him up, he was I moonlight as a comedian. No, I can't do it. I don't know, but even then, I'm still going. I'm wrong. I'm not going to sit here and say no because I don't want to give future employers the opportunity to do whatever they want with me. Just saying, watch your step. If he moonlights as a comedian, no, I won't slap him. Obviously, yes. If it's like the lowest thing and jokes are being told, but if he's like, you know, if he's like, if you look at the chart and we made 25% last year's quarter, speaking of 25%. Your wife gained 25%. I would have been like...
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Oh,
SPEAKER_01:and another thing. I have alopecia. Alopecia? Alopecia. It's the thing. It's not as bad as it's meant to be. These niggas done brought this word out of the midst of hell. We're not doing this. Hey, guys. Hey, guys. Tory Lanez also said he has it. Oh, my goodness. We're not even doing this. It's not a deadly disease. It's not anything people are like, she has it. I'm like, it's so good. Tory Lanez copied everybody. Oh, God. Next, that's a no from me, though. So I'm saying yes. That's a no from me. That's a no from me, though. I'd smack him, though. That's a no for me, dawg. All right. Are you future employers out there? Would you take male birth control? That's a no for me, dawg. One more time. One more time for me. That's a no for me, dawg. Who else? I don't even like taking that, though. That's a no for me, dawg. The no's already have it. Now we're just judging you. I don't know. I think I would. Orrin would. Because you selfless. You ain't got no kids now. You selfless. Why would you? You hear that? Orrin is selfless. I want to shoot up the club. Why can't I shoot up the club? You can shoot up the club. Just because I don't want kids. I mean, I want kids, but just because I'm not ready for kids right now, I have to wait. I would like to shoot up the club and just be like, ah. Fuck that, man. If it's birth control, you can take it off when you're ready. That's what I'm saying. I can just stop. I'd rather do the birth control than a vasectomy if that was options. If it was like, you have to do one or I'm shooting you in the head, take the pills. You'll shoot the club up? Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and do a double. That's a no for me, dawg. Yeah, because I'm going to shoot the club up anyway. If you take it, take it. Everything happens for a reason. You want me? Good and bad. And I take the good with the bad, baby. This is weird. You know what they say. Shoot up the club of blanks. I'll pull out. You're just scaring everybody. I don't even like parallel parking because I don't like to pull out. On Harlem Nights. Put that little good at. That's me. I shoot up the club. Nah. That ain't going to happen. Quit. Don't fucking talk about that shit, man. Shoot that bitch up. Go ahead. That's fine. He came in. He's like, take that stupid shit. I'll pull it up like they did Ricky. I'll send it to Hall. I'll send it to Hall. I'll send it to Hall as the man. That was me at Hall of Nights. I didn't shoot up any clubs. I'm shooting up clubs all the time. I did, but they didn't hit nothing. Shooting up one club in Pacific. Next up for me, though. Yeah, that's enough of me. Yeah, we got to get through this. All right. Studies there has come a thing that come out now that says you can live longer if you upload your brain to the cloud. You doing it or no? We had this conversation. I would do this. I would. Because my theory is behind all this shit, it's like, is it really you or is it just a copy of you? Because I feel like it's not really you. I agree with you 100% on that. Which is even weirder because it's just a copy of me that's going to take all my life experiences and not really go through them but just be like, you know what? I'm going to do this. Like, nah, bitch, I done went through the hard parts. Now you get to live. Let's just say, let's just say the rest of your life. Like, nah, hold on. Let's just go with, let's just go with what it is. What it's, it's advertising as, cause I've talked about this is it says that it's you, it's a conscious in the metaverse, a cloud or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now we all still, you know, we also have the luxury of having more of our life ahead of us than we do behind us. So I don't think that my, my feelings now would feel like when I'm 90 years old with grandkids, kids and you know what I mean I'm about to lose all of this I think my answer would be different than 38 year old me so I don't want to say a no specifically but I think that you know most of us are saying no because we're young I'm gonna say no because I don't feel like it's gonna be me it's gonna be a copy of me like if it's just a copy of my consciousness nah nigga like you ain't about to live the good life as a robot like living my life motherfucker I'm gone nigga like yes I've been I've been a conscious yeah like well have Have you seen the show Upload? Yeah, I'm good. That's kind of where the... Like, if I can get my... If they say, yo, it's actually me and then I can come back to this motherfucker once they figure out a new body with some new kneecaps and a new lower back, nigga, I'm good. Hold on. Like, yeah, I'll do it, nigga. Sign me up, nigga. I can get a new back. Trenton, hold on. I'll have the deal. Like, yeah. So this is what I'm talking about with Upload. I need a new lower back. If it's like Upload, because I've seen the show on Amazon, you know what I'm saying, where you can upload your... Eventually... I don't know spoiler alert or anything. But eventually, you know, they get to a point where they can bring... back. So that's a possibility in this hypothetical question. No, if it's just a copy of my consciousness, no. But the possibility is one day you would be able to be downloaded back to your body. And I think right now the technology they got at the infancy stages is just a copy. It's not my actual consciousness. I agree with that 100%. So I'm going to say no. It's a no for me. They're going to use your Instagram profile and see all the shit you like and you're going to be just there walking around like a bitch. But think about it. If you get uploaded, you can go to all your Instagram likes. You can be a freaky ass nigga. You can be like, I'm in Fiji right now. A freaky robot. Okay, I'm good. I don't want to go to virtual Fiji, dog. I want to go to real life Fiji. Life is already a virtual world, nigga. Like, shit, how much more virtual do we need? We got to have a virtual world inside of a virtual world? Like, we already in the motherfucking matrix of life. Now we going into another matrix inside the matrix of life? Nigga, that's too many matrices, dog. That's enough of me, dog. That's too many. I'm already in this matrix right here. I don't want to get inside of a matrix inside of a matrix. This ain't Inception, nigga. I'm not saying yes, but I'm not saying no. I'm open for this. No. I'm still open for this one. Yes, no for me. For someone who recently almost died twice, no. Like right now, today? I don't know. Later in my life? I'm going to deprive myself of the promised land because I want to stay here. You was about to say something deep. I don't want to get into it, bro. I'm going to I'm going to be like, you know what? I don't want to go to the promised land because I want to be here. Yeah. Forever. I mean, could you imagine? Forever. Forever? Forever ever? Forever ever? It's not a forever thing. Could you imagine accidentally somebody here controlled out, deleted, and it's like, and you're like, damn, you gone, bro. Then that would be exactly what happens when you die. Or select all, then accidentally the mood to the trash can. It's like, are you sure you want to delete? But you didn't move. Oh, shit.
SPEAKER_00:And it's gone.
SPEAKER_01:That's one of the things that Upload talks about. It's like, even in this afterworld, if you're broke, you only get like one gigabyte of data a month, whereas it takes like, you know, obviously you're a living thing in a fucking cloud. Doing things takes more than one gig, so you're kind of just trapped like this. They even put you in black and white. Nah, I'm good. Yeah, I'm good, bro. I'd rather go to the prom and land, see all my people that I miss, you know what I'm saying? Like, hey, what's up, B-Dawg? But hold on. You're speaking of that. You don't know you're getting into the promised land. You think you did a good job and everything. I'm not saying that you wouldn't. Righteous. But there is also that risk. You know, think about it. Like, you can go into this uploaded meta and you can pick and choose your eternal paradise. Or you can gamble on religion. Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and gamble. I'm going to take that gamble, B-Dawg. Instead of going into the damn, like, no, what the fuck, I want to be stuck here with y'all motherfuckers when I'm 98 dog I'm 98 in a 32 year old body like nigga I'm tired of this shit you ever seen a 116 year old you can go get a fucking 20 year old body my uncle my uncle even if they had a 20 year old body they'd be like yo I'm ready to go my uncle like everybody I know has gone twice over everybody you love dog it's different when you sitting there like yo everybody you know how I lived your grandkids' grandkids, bro. It sound cool right now, but they would be there. Hold on, hold on. You're talking like you would be there. Not everybody going to be like, yo, I want to upload. But see, that's the thing. It's like, for instance, I remember I met him three times in my life. My Uncle Buster, he lived to be 115. Damn. And he looked like he was like 52. I mean, smooth skin, still out there plowing his own land. And he came in the house and he was like, because my brother was just himself. Justin, I'm like, who the hell is this? Like, he knew my mom. Like, he knew everybody. He just showed up at the house when they just walked in. Because, you know, in games where you don't lock your doors, people just show the fuck up. You know? And he just walked in. That's how it is. Exactly. And like, you know, I think the way they went is like, he was like, I'm going to go lay down. And he just went to sleep and never woke up. Yeah, though. You know? And he was there? Hold on. Were you telling the story like he was there, you came in, he's... No, I was... No, I was at my grandmother's house and he just walked in. And then was that the scene that he went to sleep in? No, no, no, no. I'm just going to lay here. That was like, I don't know. I think he died after that, maybe like 10 years after that. Or no, five years after that. It wasn't that long after that, but it was crazy stuff. And I just think about it. I was like, man, that brother planted his own fruit, all that shit himself his entire life. And he looked good as shit. Yeah. but them boy get tired of that shit like my great aunt lived to be 103 she looked at me one day and I was just like yeah I know you tired of this shit she was just like yeah I mean you look tired it's just like it's just like alright I'm ready to go to bed I'm out I'm out dog cause dog it's different cause like for me it's different dog cause like I'm the youngest out of like two generations right so like my dad had me at a point where his kids already had kids that were damn near grown. You know what I'm saying? So like, I done seen everybody get old and pass away, bro. And it's different, bro. Like, I'm good, bro. I don't need to, I don't need to upload and shit like that because this is going to come a point in time when you upload and you're going to be like, damn, everybody I don't care about is actually gone, dog. And I'm just doing this shit by myself. Like, nigga, fuck this shit. I'm out. I'm good. Or they probably just upload with you and you can be together forever. Nah, nah. That'd be me. Shit, my dad? My dad gone, bro. What the fuck am I going to do? I'm going to upload? Yeah, I'm going to upload and never see my dad again? No, I'm good. I'm going to see my dad again. You're crazy. You're crazy. I'm going to see my dad again. I want to see my uncle Joe again. That's something to think about, dog. That's what I'm saying. Hold on. That's how I can stand on my decision. Well, what if you don't upload and don't see him again? That's exactly what I'm saying. I'm not saying that your answer is wrong. We just want different opinions here. I understand what y'all are going through. I understand what y'all are saying. But me personally... I know there's a good and there's an evil in this world. And with that, there comes the essence of good and there comes the essence of evil in this world. Not to get too deep, but with that being said, if there is all that, in this world, it's not too far-fetched to think that there's something else. You already said you was in the metaverse. He's talking about the metaverse. He's talking about all that. He already uploaded. Can you imagine dying and then be like, I want to play real life Grand Theft Auto and just being like, put me in a game and now All of a sudden, you're just like, snacking hookers. You can do that right now. You can do that right now. Put the Oculus on. No. Man, that job's scary. He in the metaverse. Yeah, I already in there. But that's a good... That's a no from me, dawg. That's a no from me. All right. I'm going to say, send me a pamphlet. I'm still open to this idea. No, no, I'm good, man. And you probably do the downsizing shit, too. Oh, I'm going all in. Like, motherfucking downsizing. No, hold on. This is also one of the ones where, like, you know how, like, when you die, you can't take your money with you? Yeah. Like, in this situation, the fuck you can't? Yeah. Like, all my money's going here. Prepaid account. I want full MedPass. What if you broke? You're like, damn, I get to be broken after. Like, nah, it ain't worth it. But then it's like, how are you broke in a metaverse? Like, this shit ain't real, so how are you broke? Yeah, nothing to do. Justin, we live in 2022 America. You should know by now, they'll always find a way to charge you for everything. Yeah, I know. Probably have to get a metaverse job. Everything is subscription-based. Ain't no way I'm working in a metaverse. Ain't no fucking way. You probably have to get a job once you get up there. I do want to touch on these last two, man. All right, so the last two. Could you date somebody with short-term memory loss? And that last one was a no for me, dawg, for everybody. That was a no for everybody. Yeah, everybody except for Oren. But Oren, don't count him. He's in between. That's a no for me, dawg. I don't know. I really like the movie. What? Say it again. That's where it comes from. Can you date somebody with short-term memory loss? What is it? 40 First Dates. Yeah, 40 First Dates. But they came from... I got the shit. Let's watch an A.I. Yeah, I can't do that, dog. I can't do that, dog. I think it depends. If I love this person, then all of a sudden- I can't do that. Developed it? If I was in a relationship with somebody and it happened to them, yes. Because people do that shit all the time. There's people that end up with dementia, and they're still in a relationship right now. But if you meet a chick- But if you meet somebody that's like, yo, I can't remember you tomorrow. But if you don't know that, you meet a chick who's an amazing, wonderful person on the first date, and you say, yo, we scheduled something for the next date. We're going with the 41st date. age. What'd you do for your first date? By the same thing. That's a no for me, dawg. You never seen it? That's a no for me, dawg. That's a no for me, dawg. That's three already. I'm only saying that because I don't know. I'm going to have two answers on this because I'm going to say yes because I'm a hopeful romantic. But I know myself and I know I couldn't do it. It's not that I wouldn't do it. She would have to be like...
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:The greatest thing in the... You know what I mean? Hear me out, though. Love is love. When you're in love, you know you're in love. There's different levels of love in you. You've been in way more love. It would just be hard for me to love somebody who can't remember me every day. That's the thing. They would have to make a huge... Starting off. Starting off. Starting off like that. We got to worship the correct way. Starting off, I could not be with somebody with short-term memory loss. Had they get short-term memory loss while we were in a relationship already, that's a different story. I'm going to stay. That's not what we're talking about, you know? We're talking about somebody that you just met. To her, every date is a first date. Hey, man, they can say that. That would be a challenge. I would try it. I would try it. Everybody off of different things. I would like to think yes. I'm good. Yes, I would try it. Like you said, she was just letting you know. You try it. I don't think of me. I know my personality, and I don't think I'd be able to do it, but I would try it. I would try it. We got two yeses on this one. Yeah, I would try it. Yeah, I'd do it. you would. Baby, baby, baby. I need you to remember. That's not real. Hold on. Let's change the situation. Hold on. Let's change the situation. Baby, I need you to remember. You are Beyonce. You're a world famous singer. No, no, no. I like that. I like that. I ain't thinking that. We are in love. We can do this. Here's a video. Here's a DVD. We can't use Beyonce. We got to use somebody that's single, man. Sade. You Sade. She's single. Sade. Oh, man. I love Sade. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I'll tell you everything about you. We can't use me. I think we have worse fun on this one, two and two. I'm going to say no, man. I would try. And then since King is gone, I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to say. That's a no for me, dawg. On behalf of my dawg. All right. And the last one. Oh, no. You should do the last two. Do the last two. Because I really want to do this one. Have you learned enough from TV movies and just life in general to survive in the woods? Like, you know, to be able to build a fire. Like, she's going. Place. But you're in like good weather. Let's not give you the, you know, let's not give you extreme weather. You're not in the cold. You know, you're not in the cold. There's a river right up the road. You know, like you can hear it. Do you have it? And they're like, we'll be out there in 14 days to pick you up. Do you have it in you with the shit in your pocket right now? No, because damn, what the fuck I got in my pocket? Nigga, this, I got a, if they give me like some strain. I got a lighter in my pocket. You give me some rope. I got a lighter. I got a lighter in my pocket. Look, he's got a knife. He's already, fuck, get him, kill him. Get that knife. I
SPEAKER_00:got a
SPEAKER_01:lighter. Right now. All right. Right now. Do you have it in you? I got a jewel and a lighter. No lighter. No lighter. Hold on. No lighter. No lighter. My jewel will die before I run out of juice. Part of the question is, do you think you can start a fire as well? Yeah. Do you think you have it in you of watching enough? My sister gave me this book. I remember she bought this book, and it was like these survival tips, which I still have. I don't know why she had it. She was reading it. And I know how to do the majority of stuff out of that book. And so, yeah, I can started fire with sticks. Speaking of that, there was always, I remember, like, if you were ever on a deserted island, what books would you take? Like, How to Survive on a Desert Island, How to Build a Ship and Get Off a Desert Island. I think
SPEAKER_00:I would,
SPEAKER_01:I feel like that you kind of, when you read books like that, it manifests. It's like, well, you wouldn't be stuck on a desert island, huh? I would say 15 days. So let's say that, just give it like, you know. But my thing is like, why would it, I mean, you can go around the world unless, and in 24 hours why the fuck I need to why the fuck it take you 14 days I don't know I'm just saying you have to survive they can only get to you by foot or something you know what I mean like yeah like nobody we're not gonna talk about you're just stuck here for two weeks eventually yes depending on how long I'm stuck there yes eventually I feel like I have enough know-how to because I have survival instincts though and I'm like oh yeah that's how you do that shit you're gonna be like starving when they pick you up this little scavenger. Like, man, man. That's what I'm saying. Like, okay, am I in the woods by the lake?
SPEAKER_00:Nah,
SPEAKER_01:nah. I'm going to be fucked up because I'm going to be like, yo, I need to smoke this weed, dog. And that's what's going to do it. Yo, yo, yo. All your weed going to be gone. And you're going to be sitting there. I've been eating pine cones. You're butt naked. You just fall butt naked into the middle of the place. You have nothing on you. It's about water. Why am I butt naked flying? I'm just doing that. Shut up. Your new water, a little sweet. No, I'm not butt naked flying, dog. You have your pants and nothing in your pockets. I'm fully clothed. I'm fully clothed everywhere I go. I'll eat a raw fish. Hold on, hold on. You're fully clothed in bed. I will eat a raw fish. Everywhere I go. I'm pretty sure I know how to start a fire with sticks and fucking, as long as it's dry. Who would you use for bait? How would you catch a fish? With a spear? My balls. You go in and get the little small minnows and then you use that. I think I'd be all right. Get the fire. I think I would be too. Like I said, I got to find some type of rope, some type of string. I'm going to need some type of string or rope. That's always important. Shoestrings. You can make it out of a bun. That's what I'm saying. He talking about I'm going to be naked. I'm going to have sneakers on. I think I'd be all right. That's why I always wear sneakers, though. Just button it. You never know what you're going to do. I don't know, 14 days, like three days. I said that as I got on crotch. Yeah. Three days, I'm going to be straight. After that, I'm going to be like, Lord. We haven't talked about any memes, but there was this one meme that said- You're going to be praying to God. Why does being naked with shoes on- I don't want to upload- Hold on, why does naked with shoes on feel like you're more naked than when you're naked without shoes on? It's such a weird thing. Hold on, hold on. And I thought about that. I was like, it does. Hold on, think about it. Why is it all of a sudden when you're in the shower and you're worried about somebody coming in like you're going to be less strong naked than you are with clothes on? That's the same way. No, it's not less strong. I ain't got no footing in the shower. But hear me out, though. Could you imagine, would you be more scared of a guy, so if you were going to rob somebody's house and somebody's sitting in there fully clothed with a gun or would you be more naked with a dude swinging his dick like, ah, come and running at you. I would be more scared of the naked guy, yes. You see what I'm saying? Oh boy, got a gun that can shoot you but this dude butt naked swinging his dick like, ah, running at you. Helicopter? Exactly. You know? Like, you'd be like, huh! You know, like, huh! If he's showering with a pistol then you broke into the wrong house. He sure did. Come out the shower with a pistol. The most vulnerable you will ever see a man is him walking in the middle and him taking a shit. No, I swear to God, I have. I had a homeboy. You always cover. In Charleston, I had a homeboy who got caught in this chick house in the shower. He had to fight dudes naked, dog. When I told, like, listen, I know he probably still mad at me this day. When he told me this story, when I told you, I laughed so hard. Yeah, dog. Yeah. Why could you not? That's hilarious. Yes, because you telling me that's like you was over there. I know exactly where you was at. First of all, you made it through the encounter. And then you probably ate something, took a shit, and then you decided, oh, fucking, I'm going to get in the shower. You didn't think that. I don't know. Leave? You done bust a nut in this man's house on his jersey. And use the shower. She thought she had the door, the little key. You done bust a nut on this nigga's jersey. He came back in with it. Man, dog. Came back in like, yo, who in the shower? Yo, you, this motherfucker. Nah, that's what I'm talking about. You described this story. I laughed so hard. I'm telling you, dog. Like, motherfucker. Oh, man. Motherfucker caught you with your dick out, dog. That's what goes back to what we was talking about earlier this afternoon. What do you do? You can't be in every room with your dick out. Everything comes full circle on here on the High Class Dirtbags podcast. As you can see, you can't come in every room with your dick out because sometimes you might get your ass whooped because it's the wrong motherfucking house. Ew. That rule should only apply to your house and your house only. That's a fact. Like, out of other areas. And the other house that you shouldn't expect to come in. Hotel rooms. Yeah, that's your house for the night. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why. Those are rental houses. This is my place for the night. Yeah, yeah. I don't walk around with my dick out. All right, well, we talked about a whole bunch of random shit here. Would you wear man spanks? Anybody? I saw an advertiser for them. Man spank. I don't know. Is man spanks the same thing as underarmor? Because I wear underarmor. But hear me out, though, because I have a compression sleeve because of my back. That's not the same. I wear underarmor. My body shape. Body shape. Yeah, body shape. Women's Spanx aren't for anything like... Yeah, I wear... There's no medical need for it. It just makes you look better. Hey, I'm going to say this. Like a woman. Fuck it. If I got a gut, it is what it is. Nah, I'm good. But hold on. Is it a man's Spanx? You know, like man's Spanx? It says it. No, I don't know. No, no, it just makes it look like you got a bigger... I mean, I wear under armor. Like, you know, under armor. No, that's... It's like wearing white feet. It's like tight. The thing like compresses and like... I'm good, man. And it brings up like... It's going to bring up your ass cheeks and shit, dog? It does. It slenders your waist and brings it up to... It's a double. It makes you look like you got a bigger chest. I'm going to hit that a couple of times, dog. That's how we're going out, dog. I'm good, dog. I don't need nothing lifting up my ass cheeks, dog. My balls is good. And speaking of which, I got some of them sacks, dog. I must say, dog, the chafe issue on them Saks underwear, dog. Oh, you got a pair of them fucking things? Oh, God. Oh, God, dog. That shit was like... Oh, my goodness, dog. I'm sorry, dog. To our viewers in Magic, so a few episodes ago, we talked about there was, like, this underwear that, like, they're called Saks, and there's basically, like, a little perch for your balls in them. It's, like, not a cup. It's, like, all fabric, but it's, like, underwear and then a spot for your balls. Yeah, they look like a pouch. Like, holy... I fuck around by accident and wore them shits to work one day. Oh, God. Oh,
SPEAKER_00:God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh,
SPEAKER_01:God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. The good idea, bad execution, bro. I ain't going to lie. Maybe I got the wrong size. Niggas that work like this all day. But that shit, boy, boy. When I say I was walking around like I was saddling a horse. You're not supposed to walk. I'm telling you, you're doing this all day like, shit. Yo, I got home. I used a whole big thing of cornstarch and baby powder, big dog. And when I say dog, I can officially say for me. You should have just went half the day. That's enough for me, dog. No, dog. I had to, dog. It was either that, dog, or you had to peel them bitches off of me at the end of the day, dog. Dog, I'm good on them sacks, dog. Maybe if you just lounge it around in some damn lounge pants, you know, some pajamas. Nah, I wear underwear. Yeah, dog, I don't free ass, dog. So you free ass after you... This dude do all kinds of shit. You just free ass everywhere, dog. You had a... That motherfucker be free-balling on Taco Tuesday, you That goes back to fighting out of the shower or fighting a naked nigga. Niggas come to your house and rob you. Look, if you go rob him nine times out of ten, he's going to be naked. Don't come rob me, motherfucker. See, the reason I don't free ball is because where I'm from, motherfuckers, where I'm from, motherfuckers will rob you and be like, yo, give me your pants. So if you ain't got no underwear on, give me your pants. You are. You got it. That's disrespectful. You got it, bro. Hey, I'd rather have drawers on in that situation. Yeah, you're lying. You don't want to be free balling in that situation, Oren. That's true. I'm not ashamed of anything. Hey. Y'all know. But this has been the High Class Dirtbags Podcast. If you like us, you love us, you hate us, please just still subscribe. Just so the numbers go up and we get that Viacom sponsorship. I appreciate everybody that's been a part of this episode today. Yeah. All right. Another one. It's been your boy Olanski, three I's in person. Oh, three I's on Instagram, two I's in person, one I on paper. You can't even keep up with your own name. A.K.A. You can't even keep up. A.K.A. L.L. Couchet, French voice. A.K.A. Ben Truitt, motherfucking trap voice. You dig what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Please pull me over. What's your name? Ben Truitt. Ben Truitt. That's about that. That's my name when the police put me over, Ben Truitt. Ben Truitt to me sounds like a hardy, you know, fly over state type of guy. B-E-N-T-R-U-I-T. My name is Ben Truitt. Ben Truitt. My name is Ben Truitt. Ben Truitt. Don't you ask me why. Why? Because I'm Ben Truitt. Flamespeed36 on Instagram. Flamespeed, you bet you. And that's a no from me. And you fucking hit dog head bitch head bitches. It was just a rant. I had to do it. Let's go to Jada Pinkett. Man, shout out to Jada Pinkett, man. Shout out to Jada Pinkett. Hell nah. No, she's a fucking down-to-earth bitch. I knew you was going to say it. Sorry, I had to do it. You didn't get no sponsors. No, I didn't get no sponsors. Don't worry about the cancel list before we even get on. Hey, fuck them, dog. All right, I'm out. This is Drew Lockie on Instagram. That's all I really have. And Oren. And we had a special guest. Oh, yes. He is special. It's me, Black Magic, BLK, MA on Instagram, even though I'm not on it. As always, it's time to go.